Stalking Jungle Cat of Death!

I take the title of today's blog from an author of Batman-related fanfiction.  Anyone who reads such fanfiction has probably heard of this author, Chris Dee, whose amazing understanding and treatment of the characters in the bat-clan made her Cat Tales series a huge hit.  I hope she doesn't mind my borrowing her description for my title.  It was made in reference to one of Selina's cats in a chapter of Cat Tales, but it so well describes the behavior of my own furry feline, that I had to  appropriate it for myself.  So, sorry and thanks, Chris!

But back to the original subject...

Ok! I'm ready to go on vacation!

My cat, Cassie (AKA "Kit Cat", "Cassie-cat", or "You Dumb Cat!", as the mood strikes, but never as "Kitty"), started her life with a personality that, in my mind, seemed more that of a dog than a cat.  Having been a dog-person most of my life, this suited me fine, and we settled in to apartment life quite happily.  Cassie loved to play "fetch", wanted to go with me when I traveled, and had absolutely no interest in cat-nip or other cat treats. Though an indoor cat, she preferred coming out on the balcony when I would sit out there to read.  Ah, a girl and her cat.  Could life be any better?

Who ate my tuna??

Fast forward a few years, and now I have a house, a dog, and a husband... and Cassie's utopian life has been turned upside down.  When I got married, my husband declared that kitty hairs on brand new furniture was really not the look we were going for.  The dog chewed up all her stuffed mice and other small toys, and energy efficient shades blocked her scenic view of the outdoor world.  Poooor Cassie.  She still gets to go out on the deck when we are outside, but being declawed she can't wander unsupervised.


So what is it about a cat's mind that changes them from ball-chasing dog wannabe, to dog-hating uber cat?  Cassie's favorite pastimes are now tormenting the dog, meowing in a whiny voice to get attention, and playing "stalking jungle cat of death".  How does she play this game, you might ask?  Let me give you an example...

This is the life!

This afternoon I was watching Royal Pains on tv, lying on the nice soft couch, snuggled in my nice soft blanket.  It was the perfect lazy Sunday.  Cassie, being allowed on the couch if she is on me on the couch, saw her opportunity and hopped up to sit on my stomach and purr.  Ahhhh. Is there anything more relaxing than a cat purring on you?  Thinking to return the favor and relax her, I slowly stroked her back, scratched her chin, and basically gave her a nice kitty massage.

After a while her tail starts twitching.  She shakes it almost like a rattle snake's rattle, vibrating back and forth at super speed. Ok, she's irritated.  I get it.  Her eyes narrow and I get the distinct impression that I am staring into the soul of a panther.  I raise my hand to pet her again and wham! she pounces on my arm and sinks her teeth into my tender flesh.  Ow.  Stalking Jungle Cat of Death strikes again.  Ok, it didn't hurt that bad, and no blood was drawn, luckily.  Needless to say, the hand got pushed sharply into her face to discourage this behavior and her couch privileges were promptly revoked.

So now she lounges under the table, waiting for the next time her prey becomes vulnerable.  Waiting in silence.  Waiting patiently.  Waiting to hunt again.